Tipping going way overboard

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[Charlie]

I’ve been seeing “suggested” tips on restaurant menus starting at 18% and lately going as high as 25% or more.  I personally don’t think this is right.  I’m putting this here because I think I can get pretty fair opinions from the people at AskWoody.

A Tip is a percentage of the price of the product a restaurant provides and is thus self inflating and keeps up with inflation as the price of the product (your lunch or dinner) keeps going up.  I’ve always thought that a 15% tip was enough unless you got super great service and wanted to give more.

Yes, I’m aware of the fact that most “carry out people” don’t even think of tipping nowadays, but does that mean the burden of making up the difference must fall on the people like my wife and I who always eat in at the restaurants we go to?  We also pay to have a pizza delivered and then also tip the delivery person.  So pizza delivery is a two tip deal.

Have you seen the price of Tums? It's enough to give you heartburn.

• This topic was modified 2 weeks, 1 day ago by Charlie.

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IDK Mr. Charlie. I’ve always figured my avg tip at about 20%. We rarely eat out now, and my wife orders the pizza so not sure about the “suggested” tip there. Could it be that people don’t usually have cash now and the tip is actually for the driver?

Wife had her oil changed yesterday and realized she forgot to take cash with her. Paid the bill with her card, ran to bank and returned to give mechanic $20. Wonder how many would do that?

I tip my Fedex, UPS (except for one idiot that I wouldn’t even offer a gulp of water out my garden hose), mailmen, garbage men and service people every time they stop with cold drinks and food. They stop occasionally when thirsty even if they don’t have a delivery. Also hit them with cash and gift cards a few times a year. Why? Because they are pleasant and go out of the way to do a good job.

IMHO a tip is earned – NOT automatic!

Never Say Never

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Well nice to have disposable income, if I had a $50,000 addition to my income I might feel the same. Employers do not want to p[ay their employees and relie on us to make up the difference. look at W$$$mart advising their employees to get food stamps. OK yammer yammer…..

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It seems to be entirely arbitrary who gets tips: doctors and bus drivers don’t; taxi drivers and people who wait on table do.

Why not make tipping illegal, and pay all people the proper rate for the job?

BATcher

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JPMedia, Microfix, Charlie, satrow

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Get what you are saying and agree. But, I have “tipped” doctors and dentists before. Certainly not 20%, but have sent gifts and dinners. Last one I sent a very nice new laptop to after he treated my daughter so well, and I knew he needed one. Just a small token of my appreciation.

Never Say Never

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Given what professionals like doctors and dentists charge, I show my gratitude by sending them a Thanksgiving and Christmas card.  Sometimes I write a little sentence of appreciation.  I do this with my financial advisor too because of all the good advice and money he has made for me during the past couple decades.

I can pay the tips, but I agree with Batcher, we customers shouldn’t have such a big part in paying a restaurant’s employees.

Have you seen the price of Tums? It's enough to give you heartburn.

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Standard is 20%.  If you can’t afford to tip don’t go out imo.

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You must be young – like 25 to 30 if you think 20% is “standard”.  In the 1950’s and 60’s I can remember my father saying that a standard tip was always 10%.  Any more was letting the waiter or waitress (what we called them back then) know that the service they gave was exceptional.

Have you seen the price of Tums? It's enough to give you heartburn.

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Donny H

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Charlie wrote:

I’ve been seeing “suggested” tips on restaurant menus starting at 18% and lately going as high as 25% or more. I personally don’t think this is right.

Typically the only time a tip is required (and calculated into the bill) is for parties of ten (depends on the establishment) or more.  Otherwise tipping is suggested, perhaps, but voluntary.  I know that service people and delivery drivers get paid minimum wage or less because the job doesn’t meet the criteria for mandatory minimum wage.  But waiting tables is not an easy job, by any means.

Breakfast is usually cheaper than dinner, but the service person does about the same amount of work for each meal.  Breakfast for three might cost ~$60 or so, but in my way of thinking, the service I’m getting is about the same as if it was dinner for three at ~$130 or more.  I’m gonna tip at least 25% for both meals for what I would consider a standard level of service.

That waiter/waitress may very well be working two jobs, or be the second wage earner in a two-earner family and may have two or three kids, a couple of them in school.  The younger ones may be working their way through school.  Minimum wage (or less) doesn’t cut it.

Restaurant owners try to stay competitive, and nobody wants to be the first one in town to raise prices in order to pay their staff a living wage; they would very likely lose business to those restaurants with lower prices for the same quality/quantity meals.  It’s the same situation for the big chain restaurants.  It’s a competitive business, in a business model (tipping) that has been in place for more than a century, at the very least.

Our waiters/waitresses are bit-players in a story they did not write and over which they have no control.

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Charlie, satrow

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I think 20% is fair, more if warranted. In the past I would tip with a gift card or cash for the UPS driver, and also bake cookies for him. Knew his first name and stuck with our route for over a year. Left a small bottle of brandy and box of chocolates in the mailbox with our carrier’s name on the card every year at Christmas until she retired 15 years later. Now they change delivery folks so often it’s impossible to add that personal touch on holidays. Same with UPS drivers. At one time it was a world of patrons showing appreciation unique to each individual in the service industry. It can still be that way if we defy standard protocol and interact appropriately with those individuals working hard to provide good service. Tips for us are calculated through a mix of monetary value (20% or more) and pleasant atmosphere. I’ve been on both sides of the fence. You know the customers who never “expect” but rather just enjoy being made to feel special about good food and service.

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Cybertooth

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I don’t think professional people like lawyers and doctors should be tipped on a per service basis, but a generous gift is appropriate for holidays and their birthdays. I never tip at the counter when picking up an order there, such as for a sub sandwich, pizza, or other convenience food items; that seems to have started recently and is not justified IMHO. A 15% tip is for service that is barely adequate, 20% is for generally acceptable service, and 25% for excellent service. Sixteen months ago I had to move from one building where I had lived for fifteen years in my apartment complex to another building within the complex that had all renovated apartments so that they could then renovate my old building. The movers, three men with a local company that had moved me once 27 years ago, moved my entire belongings with their truck in just an hour and a half and only charged me $300; and they didn’t scratch, damage or break anything. And I had assumed it would take twice as long and cost twice as much. I was so impressed that I gave them each a $100 tip. Truly exceptional service deserves a very generous gratuity.

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I’ve read that tipping has been done since the mid 1800’s.  Since the practice is apparently here to stay, I go along with it up to a point.  Since the Covid pandemic hit I was very much saddened to see some of my favorite restaurants have to close up.  In that time I gladly paid the prices and the tips so as to keep the remaining ones open.

Now that things have sort of gotten back to a precarious normal, I still tip what I think the service is worth.  Lately these suggested tips of 18% or more should be my decision, not the corporation or management that owns the restaurant.  I also agree that a better than normal tip should be given where a party of 8 or more is served.

Have you seen the price of Tums? It's enough to give you heartburn.

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Having worked in an italian restaurant many, many moons ago as a teenager, I had complete admiration and respect for the head chef (owner) who thought it better to promote teamwork and had a tip box at the bar which was shared between all the shift working staff that day/night. (boy! did we all graft..)
End of shift was a complimentary free meal as a ‘reward’ on busy nights only.

Back then, it wasn’t frowned upon whether customers tipped or not, although most did. waiters/ waitresses/ foodprep/ dishwashers (I was foodprep: starters and sauces and sweets) don’t ask, you’ll never get the secrets of what I learned in making sauces from scratch.

Yes, I always tip the staff when we go out for a meal, although %age is dependant on quality of service and food, not for the vanity factor nor the sheople, seen to be’s 😉

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Myst, Charlie

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As I’ve noted in my previous comments, it depends on the quality of service. We don’t follow the crowd, it’s all according to our personal experience at one restaurant or another. I worked in the service industry before my career as a journalist. The perks as you say, are humbly rewarding and whether we received a tip or not, well, not a big deal and on to the next customer. … btw, I don’t share my recipes either, to each his/her own.😏

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Charlie

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My problem with the tipping ecology is thew hardest workers are the kitchen staff. They as a rule get none of this largess. The servers have it easy and get paid the best. from personal experience. The servers are the beautiful people not a job I would qualify for.

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Our niece worked as a server in a restaurant for several years. She tells us that tips are shared among all the restaurant staff, including the kitchen help. This jibes with what I’ve heard independently.

The tipping culture could be different where you are, though.

 

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CyberSAR said:  “When I was about 13-14 got a job at a restaurant as dishwasher/busboy. Big $2.65/hr.  The waitresses were paid $1.00/hr and depended on tips.”

This is the way I always thought it was. The cook(s) and kitchen staff got paid a normal wage but waiters where paid very little and depended largely on tips.  Making waiters share their tips with kitchen staff is not fair in my opinion.

Have you seen the price of Tums? It's enough to give you heartburn.

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I feel that if a dinner for just my wife and I is served without mistakes, the waiter is friendly and knowledgeable, and watches to see if we need refills, etc., they deserve at least a 15% tip.  We make exceptions for college kids, people we may know that are having a rough time, and others that just go out of their way to give us very good service. These will always get as much as a 20% tip which to us has always been considered a very good tip.

We have lately taken notice of discounts offered at certain restaurants. These are usually 10 to 15% off the price of a meal. We use these now to help pay the tip.  It is good to know that a large suggested tip is not expected by the waiter and he/she will not feel slighted by an amount less than that.

Have you seen the price of Tums? It's enough to give you heartburn.

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WSbobby-p

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When I was about 13-14 got a job at a restaurant as dishwasher/busboy. Big $2.65/hr. The waitresses were paid $1.00/hr and depended on tips. Most did very well, but I remember a few getting stiffed on large parties. May have been an oversight, IDK, but I remember them crying at the end of the night going home with about $10. I can say having observed them they busted their butt and were polite. Saddened me immensely.

Never Say Never

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Large groups can be tough to manage on the other end for waiters and waitresses. From experience, when the family reserved an entire section of the restaurant, it became a big negotiation amongst the parents and uncles when figuring in tips and being at odds with percentages. At other times only one at the head of the table took sole control over the bill. That meant either all (a notable tip) or nothing much. It was a gamble, and the service took up the majority of energy and time. Couples who became “regulars” and had a reputation and history for being appreciative were most valued by staff, overall a good experience and evening had by all.

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I remember one crying like crazy after spending hours on the party and being stiffed. Then someone realized they forgot to leave one and returned about 15 min later and gave her $1-200 (really big tip back then). She jumped on him and smeared her tears and makeup all over him as she thanked him . It was a special moment. 🙂

Never Say Never

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Now this is one heck of a tip for a Subway sandwich! Ridiculous how long it took to get it straightened out!

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-12775261/Atlanta-7000-Subway-Italian-sub-credit-card.html

Furious Atlanta woman charged more than $7,000 for Subway Italian sub says Bank of America refuses to reverse incorrect charge: ‘I could have gone to Italy and got the sandwich’

The shocked customer noticed that the number on the tip line matched several digits of her telephone number.

Conner believes that the screen changed to ‘requesting a tip’ when she was trying to enter her phone number to collect her Subway rewards points.

Never Say Never

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